Monday, April 28, 2008

Missing Week

Scotty had his bachelor party Saturday, April 26th. There were about 15 guys attending. Guys from the league included Aaron, Brandon, Chris, Paul, Scotty, and me. Here is roughly how the events of the day went. This is a rough estimate because we were all completely hammered.


12:30 PM
We boarded a bus armed with a keg.

12:30 - 1:30PM
Drinking.

1:30PM
Arrived in Milwaukee to go on the Lakefront Brewery tour. Obviously, no one drinks while surrounded by equipment used to make beer. No! Oh we were saucy at this point. Top notch brewery by the by.

3:30PM
Left Lakefront Brewery and head for Miller Park for Brewers game versus the Marlins. I have Villanueva, the starter for the day, but I'm not starting him because he's not usually good. Brandon has Uggla and Willingham.

3:30 - 4:00PM
Drinking. Ridiculous trades offered.

4:00PM
Arrived at Miller Park for 2 hours of drinking and tailgating. We play a game called Testicle Toss. Paul and I dominate, going 3-0. First time I ever felt good about throwing around some testes.

6:00PM
Game time. More drinking. Brewers won, 4-3, I think.

9:30PM
Leave Miller Park.

9:30 - 10:30PM
Drinking on bus.

11:00PM
Aaron, Brandon and I go to a bar called the DMZ. I go on to throw the single greatest game of darts ever. Just a taste of that performance: first throw, double bullseye; second throw, bullseye; third throw, does it really matter? There's a girl there who I think would be hot if she could lose the I love me some crack and alcohol look.

12:00AM
We meet up with everyone else at a bar called Scotty's. No darts are played since it is soon discovered that any darts that come within 20ft of me disintegrate instantly simply because of the pure residual power of my previous game.

1:00AM
We go to a bar called Sunnyside. I have a really effed up headache. Probably more residual energy from my dart skills. Like when people use telekinesis to move really BIG things and they start bleeding out of the fucking nose and shit and become totally drained. Yeah, my darts power was like that.

2:00AM
Brandon and I stay at Sunnyside after hours and create a new shot called the Jappleer (pronounced "Japple - leer"). Jameson, Apple Pucker, and Root Beer. You wouldn't think it'd be good, but it was.

3:00AM
Still at Sunnyside.

4:00AM
We go to breakfast with some of the bar people. I have some kind of bagel egg concoction that I probably wouldn't order when sober. Also, I had some hash browns that looked and tasted like basket weaving.

5:00AM
Arrived home, sobered up and reviewed my drunk texts for the night. Not bad. Here was the general count...

3 of "lets do it"
2 of "sersly i wanna do stuflets do i t"
1 of "i luvru guyz ths isgreat fuckengame shit luvurthe best shit...!1?"
12 of "heyyy hi"

******

So there you have it. A day in the life of The Circuit. Hence the missed week; needed some time to recover from that one. I'll update at the end of this week.

2 comments:

wynne said...

What? No vomiting?

This is my first time to this new blog. Andy, I'm a fan of yours, but I have to admit, I don't give a rat's fart about baseball. I'm not too worried, though--I'm sure I'll still enjoy it.

But, er, sorry if I don't get all that enthusiastic about the sport itself. And if I comment just to say, "Who is that guy you posted about? Does he play baseball or something? Is that why he's wearing the hat and uniform?"

wynne said...

...well, forgive me.